Intentional Spending: How To Spend Money Wisely Because You Can’t Take It With You

You’ve spent years making values-driven decisions. You grew your wealth and shaped a life rooted in purpose. Now comes the surprising part: using that wealth not just wisely, but meaningfully.

But even when you know you have enough, it can still be easy to freeze up when it comes to actually spending it. Today, we want to give you a gentle reminder that you can’t take it with you.

Consider this your permission slip as well as your reminder. It’s your cue to shift gears from accumulation to alignment. Your financial plan is more than a safety net. It’s an invitation to spend in service of what matters most to you. If you’re at the point that you recognize you have “enough,” your next question might be, “Now what?” 

How do you use your wealth intentionally so that it supports what (and who) you love, while you’re still around to see it?

Where Do I Start? How To Feel Comfortable Spending Money

Spending your money after years of carefully saving can feel counterintuitive. The habits that helped you build wealth can become psychological barriers when it’s time to shift into spending mode. The best place to start is by defining your values.

Ask yourself:

• What brings me joy?
• Who or what do I want to support?
• What do I want to see happen in the world?

Maybe it’s chasing sunrises in Greece, or finally springing for the family lake house. Or maybe it’s funding a cause that gives your life meaning. Whatever it is, it’s time to stop second-guessing what brings you joy.

Money is a tool, and tools are useless if you don’t use them. It’s just like that fancy saw gathering dust in your garage: you have to actually pull it out and use it once in a while in order to build something that serves you. 

Intentional Spending: Begin With What Matters Most

Once you’ve identified your values, it’s time to put them into action. For most people, intentional spending in retirement falls into three main categories: supporting family, charitable giving, and personal enjoyment.

Supporting Family Members

Should you start giving to your kids now? Should  you save it all for their inheritance? How much is too much? There are no universal answers to these common questions about financially supporting family members, but there are some helpful guideposts to help point you in the right direction for you and your family. 

1. Give with intention, not obligation.

Before you write a check, ask yourself, “What’s the outcome I hope this gift supports?” Are you helping your child buy a home? Funding a grandchild’s education? Providing stability during a career transition? Clear intention makes every gift more meaningful.

2. Coach your kids not to expect the money.

Every family situation is different, but we generally recommend that you set clear expectations upfront with your family. Our clients fear that their kids will become reliant on gifts or act foolishly with money they didn’t earn. You never want financial support to feel like it’s expected of you, so be clear about boundaries. 

3. Be willing to sit back and watch your kids learn.

What if the kids blow the money with unwise choices? Well, great! They’ll realize how quickly $20,000, $50,000, or even $100,000 can go. It can be tough to watch, but we think that’s an important lesson to learn (albeit an expensive one.) It’s better they learn it now with tens of thousands of dollars rather than 30 years from now when you leave them millions.

4. Understand that fair doesn’t always mean equal.

If your children are in very different financial situations, “equal shares” may not result in equitable impact. As long as it’s communicated with care, that’s okay. Some families gift a fixed amount each year to each child. Others offer help out with specific goals like buying a home, starting a business, or paying for grandkids’ education.

Thoughtful, open conversations with your kids about money can strengthen relationships instead of straining them.The key is to stay in alignment with your values, your goals, and your comfort level.

Participating in Charitable Giving 

Many people give to charity on an ad-hoc basis. A couple of dollars here and there to the few organizations that send you a postcard. But there’s generally not a whole lot of intention around this.

A better way to approach charitable giving is to think, “What kind of impact do I want to have?”

If you feel drawn to give but aren’t sure where to begin, start with your personal life:

• What causes have shaped your life?
• Is there an organization that supported you or a loved one during a difficult time?
• Is there a problem in the world that breaks your heart?

You don’t need millions to make a difference. When you give consistently and strategically, even modest gifts can be powerful.

Tax-efficient charitable giving strategies can make your donations go further. Options like donor-advised funds, appreciated stock donations, or qualified charitable distributions (QCDs) from an IRA can make giving both meaningful and tax-efficient.

When it comes to charitable giving, it’s helpful to remember that you don’t have to commit to one thing forever. Just start somewhere, and let your values guide you. 

Giving Yourself Permission To Enjoy It

One of the most common questions people ask about their wealth (although they often ask it quietly) is, “Can I just spend it on myself?”

The answer is a resounding yes.

If you know that you have more than enough but feel paralyzed when it comes to enjoying what you’ve built, consider this your permission slip to go out and spend some of it. 

Start by asking yourself, “What would I do if I wasn’t afraid of being frivolous?”

It’s exciting to watch clients do things that they’ve been putting off for years because it always felt like something financially out of reach. Build the pool. Move to the beach. Get the car that’s nicer than you’re used to.

Some may call it frivolous, but we’re not worried about those people. If these expenses align with your values, if they bring you joy, and they’re not detrimental to your finances, we say by all means, go for it.

How To Know You’re Not Overspending

Financial planning is still a wise thing to do. Just make sure your financial plan is giving you confidence to live your life more fully, instead of limiting your lifestyle just for the sake of accumulating more. The right plan doesn’t handcuff you with rules. It should fuel your confidence, allow you to spend boldly, because the numbers back it up and the values do too. 

What A Good Financial Plan Shows You

A well-crafted spending plan helps you see:

• How much is “enough” to maintain your lifestyle. This includes your essential expenses, discretionary spending, and a comfortable cushion for unexpected costs.
• What’s available for generosity or family support. Once you know your baseline needs are covered, you can see clearly what’s available to give away or use for larger goals.
• How to pivot as life evolves. Your plan should be flexible enough to adapt as circumstances change.

Final Thoughts

Maybe the question isn’t “Can I spend?” Maybe the more important question is, “What kind of life do I want to live with the resources I have?”

You’ve done the hard work of building wealth. Now comes the rewarding work of using it wisely, joyfully, and purposefully.

Whether that means supporting your family, giving generously to causes you care about, or simply buying something a bit frivolous… you deserve to live fully right now. 

At SK Wealth, our financial advisors have been helping clients navigate intentional spending strategies for 25 years. Through our Integrated Financial Advantage™ process, we create personalized recommendations that give you the confidence to spend in ways that align with your values, helping you live with intention, tomorrow and today.

The goal isn’t just to leave something behind. It’s to live fully every step of the way. 

What would you do differently tomorrow if you fully believed the money was already doing its job?